160 / 233

Painting My Life

I’m over here
painting my life
like the energy
of the moon
on the tide.

Tue, Dec 18, 2018 | Model info | Footnotes

It’s impossible to take complete control over your life. If you think you do have control, that’s an illusion. However, that’s more in reference to a macro level. On a micro level, we have a ton of control. We can choose, like I did the other day, to give our home a fresh and lovely energy by painting some of the walls (hence in the this physiopoem, I used a painting metaphor). I chose to paint the walls, I chose to paint them cosmos gray, I chose to spend an afternoon doing it. And that decision impacts my life in a small but important way, changing the aesthetic and beauty of where I spend most of my time. However the deeper current here isn’t about paint. We can take control of little things in our lives despite not having control over life itself. You can choose to go on a walk or stay in bed watching Netflix. You can choose to drink coffee or refrain from caffeine. You can choose to stay angry or move on after a small argument with a loved on. You can choose so many little things. And some people who are privileged have more choices than others (privilege of money, health, nationality, skin color, gender, etc.), but in the end, regardless of our level of privilege, we all have choices we can make. That is how we can take control of days and moments. When life feels overwhelming, which if often can, I try to remember the control and agency I do have, and utilize it. Like maybe my purse broke and I don’t have the money to buy a new one, but I do have the ability to watch a YouTube video so I can learn to stitch it back together. Maybe my apartment doesn’t have a balcony as I would love, but I can make it cuter by painting some accent walls, you know? Take control of what you can, and roll with the punches for the rest.

Thank you to the beautiful Dharma (18, Morelia, Mexico) for being the beautiful canvas for this piece.